My darling lives in a world that is not mine
An old child misunderstood... out of time
Timeless is the creature who is wise
And timeless is the prisoner in disguise
Oh who is the beauty... who is the beast
Would you die of grieving when I leave
Two children too blind to see
I would fall in your shadow... I believe
My love is a man who's not been tamed
Oh...my love lives in a world of false pleasure and pain
We come from difference worlds... we are the same (my love)
I never doubted your beauty... I've changed
And when I call
Will you walk gently
Thru my shadow
The ones you dream of
The ones who walk away
With their capes
Pulled around them tight
Cryin' for the night
Cry for the nightbird
-Stevie Nicks, "Nightbird"
9/30/2002
Day of Distraction
I'm having one of those days where I don't want to do anything I'm supposed to be doing. The accounting team is coming over tonight so we can put together our final presentation for Thursday. I need to reread our paper and after starting it 2 times, I still haven't focused enough to finish it - let alone comprehend it. I really don't care, but I NEED to care. Also need to clean house. I never want to do that.
Too many distractions today. Lots of little interesting emails, bulldozers across the street, beautiful weather, dinking around with minor computer glitches, my pears are ready for harvest...I think I need to get out of the house. My brain is flitting from one thing to another and accomplishing next to nothing.
The course I'm currently enrolled in is Accounting. I can't believe I used to like this stuff. Actually I do like crunching numbers, looking at relationships, and trying to figure out what's not being said by reading between the lines. What I really don't like is writing papers about it. In the years since my undergrad work, school has changed. Instead of completely individual effort, lots of hands on problems and tests; I now have papers, presentations and teams. It's not all bad. I'm learning, but I was much better at tests than I am at papers. I agonize over every word. Analyze each concept to death and spend way too much time on it. I'm going to have to learn to go with the gut get the ideas down quickly and move on. If anyone has any other suggestions, I would welcome them. So glad this course is over Thurs. Unfortunately between now and then I have 2 problems, 2 papers and 1 presentation to prepare. Today I spent most of the day on 3 other problems - at least they are done.
Then comes Law...another Blech! But that will take care of my core course work and I can get into the CIS classes.
One of my team members, who is becoming a friend, is a manager at a large IT company. She says they are looking for Project Managers so I gave her my resume. Hope, hope. Prayers and crossed fingers are welcomed.
"I want to use this occasion to offer a perspective on what lies ahead for our industry. To many observers today, its future is unclear, following perhaps the worst year in its history. A lot of people chalk that up to the recession and the 'dot-com bubble.' They seem to believe that when the economies of the world recover, life in the information technology industry will get back to normal.
In my view, nothing could be further from the truth."
I find this statement remarkable. Usually Annual Reports are filled with all kinds of positive rhetoric so that investors will invest. A statement like this is shocking in its prediction that all is not well and I personally found it very refreshing. IBM is planning on things being very different in the very near future. The status quo is not going to continue. I believe this is true for most businesses today and employees like me must accept it and plan accordingly.
I'm making new plans, rethinking old ideas, examining my attitudes and actions. I must or I won't survive.
All my life I've loved sports. Both my mother and father were athletic and they raised me to love the grace and beauty that played out on the golf course or the playing field. My father spent much of his free time either playing golf, tennis or in front of a football or basketball game on TV. Mom had won the hometown women's golf championship twice before she married and won it at least 10 times after that. She took up tennis in her 30's, while getting a degree in physical education, and that became her game of choice. She still plays both regularly even though she's approaching 70.
As a young girl, I often attended the local high school football games with my father. We'd stand on the side lines and he'd talk plays with his cronies. I must have learned something, for I started calling the plays as they happened, much to the amusement and amazement of my Dad and his friends. I was always sad that girls could not play football. I wanted so much to play that game. In college I joined an intramural flag football team and finally got my wish. Our little team went to playoffs, but mostly we just had a great time.
I also played softball in gradeschool and highschool. I never really cared for softball/baseball, but it was the only organized sport for girls in my hometown of 4000 and I wanted to play sports.
I was given my first set of golf clubs for my seventh birthday - a driver, a five-iron and a pitching wedge. This was supplimented with my grandfather's MacGregor putter (which I still use) and a Hogan five wood from my father's set. Dad later gave me other clubs and sets. I still use many of the clubs he gave me. I don't play much golf these days, but I'll never forget the day, about 5 years ago, when I hit my favorite club, a seven-iron, 130 yards and it took one bounce and landed in the hole. My first and only hole-in-one. What a thrill. The gal I was playing with and I start whooping so hard that several guys drove their carts over to join in the fun. The alcohol was flowing that night.
So why am I going on and on about all of this? Well, life hasn't been too kind lately and I was in need of some inspiration. Often, for me, this comes in the form of some movie. Today, I watched "The Rookie" starring Dennis Quaid. Although the setting is baseball, the story is so much more. It's about dreaming dreams and pursuing them, it's about family and friends, it's about accomplishing the impossible. I needed to see this very badly today and wanted to write about it as well. Whether you like sports or not, if you like movies that deal with the triumph of the human spirit, run to see this movie. It's based on a true story and it certainly made my day. It inspires me to dream and dares me to accomplish.
If anyone has wondered why I had Jean-Luc Picard toasting Lori in my previous post, it is because she has two new additions to her excellent AU, the Captain and the Counselor. And the Captain is pleased!
All fans of TNG, Captain Picard and/or Counselor Troi, will love this series of stories that begin on the Enterprise-E three years after it is commissioned. These stories develop the characters of Picard and Troi in a way the TPTB never could have.
The recent additions:
Pacing the Cage - Jean-Luc and Beverly attend a funeral together. This is set after Lori's current WIP, "On the Madhouse Boards."
